not easy

it’s not as easy as it seems to be
for my lips are smiling
but not my broken heart

am i to suffer in perpetuity
for that one mistake one time
but what of all the good i did

to wander aimlessly waiting for you
for just one more night
but you seem to have moved on

it is not as it seems
for my eyes seem to sparkle
but not my dead soul

judgements

A photo by Julia Caesar. unsplash.com/photos/DpoMKEARZe4

a little hair out of place
a little longer in the bed
a little decibel higher
and i am judged

there’s a finality in that guess
no heed given to what i said
trying to balance a high wire
still i am judged

that plastered smile on your face
is that purple skirt with red
like a hooker on hire
yes, you are judged

everyone judges everyone else
but judge themselves, they see red
and yet goes on, this quagmire
we are all fucked

just listen

A photo by Redd Angelo. unsplash.com/photos/60fa9BMxvpE

why is it that what i say
and what you hear
is always out of sync

my truths are your lies
your darkness for my light
wouldn’t it make you think

and yet i stand here
resolute and alone
taking the road high

and there you are
always with a reason
to say goodbye

waiting for you

waiting

withdrawn from the world
alone for a long quest
inhibited and furled
thriving on my own zest
inundated as solitude hurled
never felt such unrest
geared for a life whirled
fear thumping neath chest
optimistic yet curled
rational, yet with unrest
yearning for love swirled
one day it will attest
until then, my world…