I’ve been in a limbo half my life. Stuck at the same place I so desperately wanted to try for the first time. It looked out of my comfort zone. A nice challenge. And now, years have passed and it has become the ultimate comfort. all I want, all I need – is to be able to get out of this  comfort zone, and into a fiery pit that would make me run like never before.

All I keep thinking about is the various ways i can employ to achieve this goal. And somehow, nothing seems to work. Even if I start the whole thing afresh. I can’t understand why I am being tested in such a manner that all I can see is haze before my eyes and fear in my mind. Does it mean that I don’t have what it takes to get out of the pitiful position I’m in? Am I responsible for all of this? Whatever ‘this’ is…

I’ve had thoughts of giving up. But my mind just can’t do it. So weak! And that is why here I am, a fool, trying and trying to get somewhere. Waking up everyday thinking today will be different, and going to bed at night with just a replay of the past days, just like the days before, jut like the days before.


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